Silvia Club of NSW

A husband and wife are celebrating their 50th anniversary. That night the wife approaches her husband wearing the exact same sexy little negligee she wore on their wedding night. She looks at her husband and says, "Honey, Do you remember this?" He looks up at her and says, "Yes dear, I do. You wore that same negligee the night we were married." She says, "Yes, that's right. Do you remember what you said to me that night?" He nods and says, "Yes dear, I still remember." "Well, what was it?" she asks. He responds, "Well honey, as I remember, I said, "Ohhhhhhhhh Baby, I'm going to suck the life out of those big tits and screw your brains out."

She giggles and says, "Yes honey, that's it. That's exactly what you said. So, now it's 50 years later, and I'm in the same negligee I wore that night. What do you have to say tonight?" Again he looks at her and looks her up and down and replies, "Mission Accomplished."

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My other ride is your mum.

And one more b4 i log off..........

There are these three guys in a desert dying of dehydration. Off in the horizon they see a house and finally manage to struggle to it. The first guy goes up to the door to ask for water. The door is opened by this really old, wart-covered, puss covered, scaly, toothless old woman.

"C-c-c-can I h-h-h-have some w-w-w-water for me and m-my friends?" he asks.

She replied, "I will... if you have sex with me."

The guy pukes all over the woman and runs back to his friends.

"You guys would not believe who answered the door. Some really gross old lady!" he tells them. "She said we could have water if I had sex with her."

"Why didn't you then?" asks he second guy.

"Because she was so ugly, I was sick and couldn't do it!"

"Oh, you are such a wuss. I'll go up to the door," the second guy says.

He goes up to the door and rings the bell. The old hag answers.

"W-w-w-w-w-w-waaaaaa......" He uses all of his will power to not hurl.

"Water? Yes, I have water," she says knowingly. "But you have to have sex with me."

"AAAAAUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!"

He runs back to his friends and before he could say a word, the third guy goes to the door and rings the bell.

"What do you want for some water?"

"You have to have sex with me."

Knowing that if he doesn't do something, he and his friends will all die. So he follows the lady into her kitchen.

"Do me here," she told him.

He sees 3 ears of corn on the counter and gets an idea.

"Lay back and close your eyes. And keep them closed!"

The witch lays back and spreads her legs. The guy nearly pukes after seeing this. He picks up an ear of corn and screws her with it. Finally she is finished. He throws the corn out the window. "Oh, God. That was the best orgasm of my life. If you do that again I will give you a million dollars."

"Then lay back and close your eyes again."

This she does and he does her with the second ear of corn until she is satisfied. Then he throws it out the window. This time she doesn't even open her eyes.

"If you do that again, I will give you a Jeep so you can get out of the desert."

"Eyes closed," he says.

Then he does her with the last piece of corn. He brings her to multiple orgasms.

"Ohhhhhhhhh........ The water, money and Jeep are outside," she says as she squirms in ecstasy.

So he runs like hell outside and grabs the water and money and jumps into the Jeep. He wonders where his friends are and drives around to find them. He finds them by the window.

One of the guys says to him, "Hey, man. I hope you had fun. We just ate the three best pieces of buttered corn you could have imagined!"

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My other ride is your mum.

wrong and funny....
where do you get this stuff?

oh man so feral warlock

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No one does it better than an S15
SiDeWaYz
A Black Panther

That 2nd joke was sick. I like it!

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The Golf is like an 16-year-old girl with big boobs. You know it's wrong but you can't keep away from her.

From the deep, dark, sick and twisted depths of my imagination.....

nah, www.spikedhumour.com

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My other ride is your mum.

i bet thats your website pervert

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M35 Stagea.info @ http://www.m35stagea.info/

i've seen your's, at least mine doesn't have fish anal rape

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My other ride is your mum.

thats ark's website. mine has mostly tasteless jokes like your own

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M35 Stagea.info @ http://www.m35stagea.info/

hahahaha
exactly like the bananas&custard joke that was grossing everyone out in primary school. except she wasnt a witch, we just thought it was disgusting... many years on...

I thought the corn one sounded very...ahh.... tasteful

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My other ride is your mum.

ROFL u dirty bastard!!

you should post more often!

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M35 Stagea.info @ http://www.m35stagea.info/

hehe i try, although i've been on holidays the past coupla weeks checkin' out the ahh.....scenery....yep...that's the one, scenery

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My other ride is your mum.

Are you talking about that video?? Haha so funny

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Disclaimer: If you have'nt worked it out by now I CANT SPELL FOR SHIT.